Three Cups of Tea

Yesterday I just finished reading Three Cups of Tea. It's a beautiful story of Greg Mortenson's adventures in building schools in northern Pakistan and Afghanistan. He did not plan on building schools, but while getting lost after his failed attempt on K2, he found himself in a remote village in the hills of Pakistan. 

My degree is in Intercultural Studies. I usually have to explain it to most people, but it involves problem solving and researching case studies for being a relevant missionary in a cross-cultural setting. Though Greg's work was not a Christian missionary endeavor, stories like his fire me up for what I love to do: serve people and build peaceful and meaningful relationships.

I find that the concept of this title seems somewhat lost here in the US. Sure, we love to grab coffee (or tea) and get to know someone at a trendy cafe, but this is different. How often do we invite someone into our home the first time we meet? What if the house messy and you didn't plan for anyone to come over? Would you offer someone your best wine or meal or dessert - the best of anything that you had? For this rural village, they offered Greg, a foreigner, their finest tea. 

Mortenson explains that sharing three cups of tea is a literal way of business and interaction for Pakistanis (and many other cultures). Just imagine how long it takes to drink three cups of tea. You really have to spend time with that person: getting to know him and building trust with him. When Greg first saw the children of the village without a school to go to, he decided he was going to find a way to build them one. Oftentimes, when we see people that seem like they're in need, we assume we know what's best for them--like in Mortenson's case, he wanted to build a school. But after spending time and drinking tea with the elders, he found out what they really needed first was a bridge.

A large part of being good at cross-cultural communication or any communication for that matter involves LISTENING. I believe we learn so much more when we listen! Sit down, have tea, be engaged! Before we ignorantly make assumptions or cast judgement, take the time to get to know people and understand where they come from. 

Yea, so it may be a few years old, but there is so much this book has to offer - especially in dealing with: communication, culture, culture shock, international travel, media, following your dreams, perseverance, making a difference, etc. 

Let's drink tea together!

Heart Cry

I've been mulling over the idea for a long time:

My heart yearns to give.

To help. 

To share.

To be a part of something beyond myself.

I've been searching for the "right" place.

Something that just pulls on my heart.

There are so many organizations out there these days, which is phenomenal - 

but some, I'm not sure if I trust.

I had a lovely talk with my beautiful friend Delilah a few weeks ago.

We brought ourselves from tears to laughter in conversation.

I told her how I'm having a hard time being at home and without a job.

How I'm so ready to just be a part of something.

And she really spoke to me in such simplicity.

“Neighbors.”

Serving those next door.

We have several neighbors on our street that I'm just getting to know.

But there's one particular lady: Maxine.

John Mark and I run by her house all the time.

We began by waving, chatting, etc.

One day I just really wanted to give her cookies.

I brought them over and she let me in.

It has definitely opened our opportunity to get to know her.

It's crazy how when we take small steps, God opens small doors.

We are slowly getting to know Mrs. Maxine.

A recent widow. An artist. A gardener.

We are excited to continue to get to know and to serve her.

Just a little reminder of those small things we can be a part of.

I trust the God has BIG plans for JM and I.

My heart rejoices when I can serve.

When I can share God's love and hope.

But on those days when I can't be a part of something big, there's always something small -

that may in fact be big for someone else.

Church. What?

Since we've been married, JM and I have been looking for a church home.
9 months later, we think we've found one.
Our search has been a huge frustration.
We went to a church for 3 months that we liked, but it was an hour away.
It was hard to feel a part of the community.

It's so hard finding a church.
Why?
JM and I want to be in full-time ministry.

When it comes to visiting churches, we become very critical (not in a negative way). But there are some really serious issues and questions that we have when it comes to wanting to be a part of a church family.

We've been wanting so bad to get involved, but we haven't had a peace about staying at the churches we've visited. 

In the last 9 months, we've been to 6 churches. And several weekends we were out of town this summer.

We've seriously wrestled with the question: Are we being too picky?

But the reality of it is this: Church is not just a place to visit every Sunday. It's a community. It's a family of believers united with the same heart and mind. It's a place that should be reaching out to those in need; to those that don't know about God. Sunday should be a day to come together and share what God has been doing in our lives all week long. Sunday's message should just add to the fire and passion we are learning on our own throughout the week.

Some topics we've come across in our search for a church community: 

-The music is so powerful, but where's the heart of the message?

-Where is the passion in this community? 

-Why is the website so outdated? Where is the website?

-It's a "pot-faith" dinner, we don't call it pot luck because we don't believe in luck? What?

-15 minutes of weekly news and a 20 minute message?

-The pastor did what, with who?

-You're new, we can tell by the way your dressed?
-Where's the outreach?

It has been an incredible learning experience through all this. What would I have felt in all of this if I had never even been to church before? Would it be weird, scary, uncomfortable, exciting, empowering?

There is always going to be a debate as to how church works. The problem is, we are people and we like things in different ways. So being a relevant church in one place, because that's how "they" do it, will not work in another. BUT, when it's a church guided directly in surrender to the Holy Spirit, I believe it can be RELEVANT.

What JM and I had to really come to grips with is this: We need a church that most importantly is passionate about God and alive! Walking into a church that is not excited about the God we serve is heartbreaking. That doesn't mean there has to be a show and cool things everywhere, but a place that no matter what the building is, what music is being played, what the preacher looks like, there is no question as to why they are meeting - to share God's love.

On Sunday, for the first time in a long time, we felt a sense of peace and community in a church. It's still a bit of a drive (35-40min), but JM and I left church wanting to serve there. We didn't have to discuss our questions and concerns; we talked about how excited we were to finally have a place to serve. 

We felt a huge opportunity to get involved. 

What are some things we liked about it?

In words:

Passion. Diversity. Community. Outreach.

Furthermore,

The pastor used to be a full-time missionary in Spain.

He preaches like my childhood pastor [Everything based on Scripture!]

Their website is interactive and up-to-date.

We saw all age-groups.

Very outreach and mission driven.

Several people talked to us.

The music was worshipful and heartfelt - not a show!

They are starting small groups on a secular college campus.

They have small groups throughout the week.

They have a "Serve the City" ministry that collaborates with other churches and local organizations.

We are really excited where God takes us in this church community! Please pray as we take the next step!